It's all in a name

Across the hair boards, there a posts where naturals play the "Name your 'Fro" game. It's always cute and funny. Ladies select their name and explain why. I love it when I see something really original that actually has some type of significance. I tend to role my eyes at the ones saying they name their fro "Sasha Fierce" because it so fierce and they love Beyonce. Yuck! What does that really have to do with you?

I thought about it and decided I would do name my fro. She is official dubbed Jessi Rose. The reasons are as follows: My favorite romance/erotic writer is Beverly Jenkins. She writes a series of novels based in the 1800s about black men and women who accomplish great things. They range from deputies, conductors in the Undergroud Railroad, slaves, business moguels, doctors, lawyers, cowboys, train robbers, madams at brothels and the list goes on. They usually overcome so obstacle and do something for the greater good of thier towns and the black community. She also incorporates historicaly facts into every book. Jessi Rose comes from the book "The Taming of Jessi Rose." Jessi Rose is a woman who is confident, unafraid of what anyone says/thinks of her, unconventional and a bit on the wild side on the days she chose not to be tamed. Those are characteristics that people who know me well have described me as and I fell that my hair is the same way. My hair shows my confidence and gives me more. Although I did care at first, I no longer care of other people's opinions of my hair (although I do love to hear them if they are positive). Natural hair is unconventional. Natural hair can be wild or tamed, just depends on the day.

So, all of that to say, my 'fro is Jessi Rose, whether she be tamed or wild!

Detangling

My hair is getting longer and with that, detangling sessions are getting longer. W-n-g's aren't so quick anymore but are still one of the styles I mainly wear. I've been getting fairy knots for the past month or two. I officialy despise those things! I'm also getting more tangled and knotted hair. They are easy enough to get out but still I worry about breakage and splits because of it.

Currently, I detangle using just my fingers. I prefer that to a wide toothe comb because right now, it's easier and it works. I did use a comb one day and felt like I was breaking off a bunch of my hair. It shed the same amount but I just didn't like it. Plus, I felt like it seperated my curls a little too much and gave me a jheri curl type of look. Lol! I love chunky curls. (Guess I won't be investing in a Denman after all.)

I shed a lot so I'm going to continue to detangle a couple of times a week. Stretching detangling sessions would probably be horrific. I'm going to stick with HE conditioners for detangling sessions. The slip they have is awesome. I'll only stray from this line when I go organic (meaning when I have more $$$$). I will continue to use my fingers as I am most comfortable and less scared about breakage as I have more control over what's happening to my strands. I will reincorporate monthly deep protein condish into my regimen because I'm noticing a lot of elasticity when detangling. My hair has too much moisture and very little strength. Gotta get over that protein fear because my hair is telling me she needs it. I will listen!

Keep it simple

I was reading some hair site, not sure which one, and there was a woman with a fierce w-n-g. She wrote instructions on how she acheived hers. She had a long list of steps that were too much for a w-n-g in my opinion. To me, it's real simple: cowash, shake, moisturize and seal.

One good thing while reading her list was I remembered that my w-n-g turns out soooooo much better if I leave a little of the condish in when I cowash. So, using HETT, I did a cowash. I shook my head (I tend to use a washrag to cover my face so the condish doesn't get on my face). Moisturized with SoftSheen Carson Roots of Nature and sealed with castor oil. I let my hair drip dry so I wrap an old tshirt around my shoulders when I do whatever else I need to do. I've gotten to the point where I don't even blot my hair with the tshirt or a towel. It seems to work better for me that way because my texture easily gets frizzy. But to keep it from dripping too long, I do shake my hair for at least a minute to get rid of as much excess water as possible.

I immediately loved the results. My hair looked like it did when I just get out of the shower. Perfect curls with practically no frizz. And the curls were so well defined. I love it. A couple of people asked if I did a strawset. I've done it a 3-4 times with the same results.

One thing I can say, I don't like how my hair hangs down when it's dry. I fluff when it's 75% dry. I also think it's funny that the front seems to hang down like bangs if I don't fluff it a lot.  

I feel the PJ in my coming alive!!!!!!!!

I've never been much of a PJ (product junkie). I can honestly say I buy few products and use them completely before I purchase something different. But with this list of silicone-free hair products, I can feel my PJ clawing it's way to the surface!

http://ladylonghair.googlepages.com/'cone-freeconditioners


(link from Tia's blog Her Best Hair)

Other random things

Here's a few other random things that happened while my hair was straight.

It rained Tuesday. I forgot that I needed a hood or umbrella. There is an umbrella somewhere in my Jeep. Not sure where. I was literally lol-ing as I ran throught the rain to my Jeep. Luckily, my hair didn't revert.

My supervisor (black woman) is always asking me when I'm going to loc my hair. I tell her at least once a month that I'm not. Apparently one of her relatives when natural via locs and she has it set in her head that I am too. When I straightened, she commented that it looked nice but she preferred my hair the other way. She said that it suits me and shows the amount of confidence I posess to wear it that way. I don't require anyone's approval to wear my hair any particular way but it pleased me that she likes it.

After the bantu knot out, I needed to dc, poo and do a w-n-g before work. I used my new favorite dc mix and let that sit for an hour. One thing I found interesting was the amount of dc I needed to use. My hair was straight and dry when I applied it. I used less than half what I normally use. I was shocked and it felt weird. But the dc took very well and my hair was soft and moisturized as always.

I got tons of happy compliments from family and friends once my hair was curly again. Also got a few request to never straighten my hair again because my natural is so becoming on me and it makes me, me. A few people who really pay attention to my hair commented that my hair seemed even curlier after that first w-n-g. It actually did. Not sure why.

Unexpected

Well, I got some interesting reactions to my straight hair. No one like it. Well except for this black woman at my job but she always gives me the side eye when my hair is in it's natural state. Have to love the side eye. lol!

Everyone else, however, responded with "ooooh....you straightened you hair. Wow. It's long. So...when are you going to wash it and make it curly again." I confided in one coworker that I wasn't too thrilled with it myself and she responded with "good, wash it when you get home tonight. The natural hair had to grow on my at first but now I'm used to you with curly hair. I don't like it straight." I love my coworkers for their honesty. They had me cracking up laughing all night.

The next day, I was still wearing straight hair and was again questioned about how long my hair was going to stay this way. I told them I wouldn't be washing it because it took so long to do but I agreed to compromise and make it somewhat curly.
I orginially wanted to do pin curls because MSatch did some and they looked so great on her. But I tried a couple and wasn't really getting the hang of it. Enter the bantu knot!

This only took a few minutes and was fairly easy to do since I'm used to bantu knotting my single strand twist. Some of them didn't come out to well so the left side was tigher and looked way better than the right. The front right was real funky looking so I had to pin it up a little bit.

Wore this for one day but the curls had fallen a lot by the end of the night. I washed the next day.

Time on my hands

I got bored and decided to straighten my hair. I used low heat to blow dry, Palmer's Coconut Oil Hair Milk to moisturize (and strengthen as it has a lot of protein) and pure shea to seal. The shea butter seemed to really help with straightening. It got a lot straight the first time around, not looking very frizzy.

One thing that I found interesting, I was less than half-way through flat ironing when I decided I didn't like it. The only reason I kept going was because I'd already put so much work into it. I did love the bangs however. I've always loved bangs and mine were long and hanging in my eyes. For some reason, I like that.

Picture time! Oh, and please excuse the pissed off expression in the picts. Someone was annoying the hell out of me and wasn't getting the hint that I wanted them to go away. lol!

WTF was I thinking?!?!?!?!?!

Just a quick post to say I was in the shower doing what was supposed to be a quick w-n-g that turned into a damn-near 30 min detangling sessionon my TWA. Why? Because crazy me decided to sleep on a w-n-g for 2 days without any type of scarf to protect my hair. This lead to a horribly matted and tangled mess. Oh, and I was having a severe case of HIH (hand in hair) syndrome which I tend to get whenever I do a w-n-g so I was playing in my hair for 3 days.

I was so mad at myself this morning. But in that seriously horrible detangling session, I realized that I needed a protein dc because my hair was feeling really stretchy (meaning too much moisture and not enough strength).

One of my new favs!

Elasta QP Mango Butter Moisturizer. I had been wanting some for a while but was having the hardest time finding. Not sure why. I finally found some and I was super excited to try it. I co-washed immediately so I could use it on fresh hair. The smell is divine!!!! Everyone in my house was oohing and ahhing over the smell (mainly b/c I was pushing it under their noses saying "smell this!).

It's really thick which is something I and my hair absolutely love. The thick moisturizers work so much better for me. I was already aware that EQMB has silk protein so I was worried about using it. My hair doesn't require a lot of protein and will quickly feel rough from the application of it. On the ingredient list, silk was pretty close to the bottom so I felt a little bit safer. There's probably not that much in it. I still only used a small amount and followed that with the shea/softsheen carson mix that I made before (hoping to offset any protein overload). Then, I sealed with castor oil.

I did this for a couple of days before realizing using all 3 of these was too much. My hair was feeling really good. Well moisturized and strong and soft but...it was too much product. You could feel it on my hair when you touched it. So I washed with poo to clarify and tried again. This time I used shea to seal (shea doesn't moisturize my hair) but still used both moisturizers (still have this protein fear). It was lighter with the shea instead of castor oil but I still felt it was too much. I cut back on moisturizing though. I normally have to do it every day. Esp in this cold weather. But with this combo, every other day or two was working perfectly.

I'm going to be brave and try just using the EQMB and shea and see how that works. Either way, I love this stuff and will be keeping it in supply. I love the smell and it really does make my hair feel silky smooth. (lol...silky smooth...so corny!)

As I said before, I was finally able to get a deep conditioner for my hair. My beloved Elsta QP DRP-11. I tried a slightly different mixture and my hair loved it.

I mixed DRP-11 with Creme of Nature conditioner, salt, honey and EVOO. The mixture felt more whipped than creamy and that may have made the difference. I usually use HEHH instead of CON and I rarely add salt. The new mixture is going to be the one I use from now on. My hair felt so soft and moisturized.

As for new products, I ran out of HEHH and wanted to try HE Totally Twisted. I've been hearing a lot of naturalistas of every hair type saying how much they love that stuff. I used it for a co-wash a few days after I dc. Right now, I don't have a solid opinion of it. It is very creamy, even more than HEHH. I really liked that. I felt like I used less of it when detangling. My hair was well moisturized and felt great. As far as the w-n-g...it wasn't the greatest. A lot of strands were looking straight. It was weird but this happened to me before when I wore my hair in stretched out styles for a long time and the did a w-n-g. I think after I wash a few more times, I'll be able to better tell how it works. So far, I like it though.

Next post will be about a new moisturizer I got.

Back to our regularly scheduled program

My hair was so mad a me a couple of weeks ago. I ran out of deep condish and due to lack of extra funds, couldn't purchase anymore. My hair has gotten used to the weekly dc routine and was feeling dry and nothing was keeping me moisturized. I had also discovered that wearing protective styles caused my hair to dry out more than when I wore w-n-g's. Stretched hair means less of the natural oils my scalp produced was making it to my ends (due to gravity) thus leading to more dryness.

I attempted to give myself a couple of different dc treatments that turned out horribly! First I attempted oil using melted shea butter and evoo. I guess I used too much b/c it was running down my face and was just a big mess. I also don't have a dryer so I was just hoping for penetration w/o the use of heat. I didn't notice any results but I know I did it incorrectly.

Second, I tried a mixture. I mixed Creme of Nauture condish with honey and the rest of the shea/evoo mixture. In an attempt to incorporate heat, I wet a hand towel with extremely hot water and wrapped that around my head which was covered in a shower cap. I rewet with the hot water when it cooled off. It worked okay but just didn't give what my hair needed.

In the meantime, I wore protective styles and moisturized daily. When I realized my hair seemed much dryer as it stretched more, I switched to w-n-g's daily. I was finally able to get more dc and another product I was exited to try. More on those things in my next post.

Surprise, surprise

Okay, so you may remember my post on how irritated and disappointed I have been with a friend who was saying negative things about my hair and commenting on how "lucky" white girls are because of their hair texture. She calls me this weekend and announces that she has decided to transition. Apparently, a woman at her job has been natural for a few yrs and after seeing this woman's hair (I believe it was straightened) she has decided to grow out her perm.

She asked her co-worker for help and all she did was send her a link to a hair forum. She only said I just grew out my hair and I joined this forum. I'm thinking...really? That's all the info and encouragement you can give someone who's just starting their journey?

I have to admit, when she first asked me for help, I didn't want to. I was thinking of the stupid shit she's said about my hair and was like eff it, she can learn on her own. But then I thought about it. If I had to go through this alone, I wouldn't have even know what to do or even where to begin. So I agreed to help her as much as I can, including going to the store with her this weekend to help her pick out products. I sent her the links to a few of the sites I love and I'll just be one of the people in her support system as she goes through this transition. Hopefully she'll make it.

I just hope now she stop all that "white girls are lucky" crap and embrace her own hair.

And I'm still off topic...

I'm excited about a venture I'm calling 30/30. What I'm working on right now is a challenge but not a very hard one. Either I do it or I don't. I've planned to write and post 30 short stories in the next 30 days for erotica website The House of Blerotica.

I'm off to a good start. I posted 2 stories tonight and hope to do another before work tomorrow night. Since these are shorts, I can write them fairly quickly and I've made a list of topics so I don't waste time struggling to come up with concepts. That's pretty good for me b/c planning ahead when I write isn't something I normally do. (yeah, I know that bad but that's just me.)

I'm pretty excited about doing this and hope that with this and some marketing, I can bring more readers to my site. Consistent vistors would be great too.

I've just created a Facebook page for THOB which I've already started using to let readers know about 30/30. I'm also going to be posting "status" updates on all social networks I belong to to attract readers that way. And of course, word of mouth so I'll just be telling a lot of pple. Hope this works out well.